Show tonite Garland Ox Bodmin!!

Howdy!
Well the other day certainly began as per normal, driving from a friends where dippy me had to deliver forgotten birthday gift from the night before- twas a tiny Cornish lane - two way with large hill....I was tootlin along enjoying the moment and even smiling at the small grouselike bird as it scuttled in front of me for what seemed like 17 hours to the city girl in me- when after acknowledging and saying aloha to said birdie- I carried on, only to be sprung upon by 15 large beasts of the bowvine variety! They waddled along for a few minutes as I slowed and began looking for the farmer that MUST be nearby. They finally found a little area to stand in and moved out of my way- all but 2 that is. One black and one white- they were the Ebony and Ivory of the cow world, and just about as exciting I hasten to add! They wandered along in front of my still slower vehicle looking over their shoulders every so often and as I watched them casually with a certain amount of Country comfort, I realised that they were in direct path of a main and very busy road! Panic struck as the reality of the situation sunk in- this could be a very real opportunity for some free beef! I began to dial my Mum-in-law's number thinking that she of anyone, would know what to do- but then it dawned on me that this was an emergency that needed immediate attention- by ME and FAST! So I threw down the phone, stopped my car, put on my flashers and got out. The white cow was already teetering on the road- when I began to SHOO them away, or so I thought anyway. As much as any red blooded gal from San Francisco can really......I shooed and as I shooed I began to quietly hum the theme tune to Bonanza. Where oh where was Candy when I needed him most? Strong and silent and all in black....but I digress. I began to flag down cars and lo and behold a few even stopped, not for a woman on the side of the road- nooooo but for the large and somewhat bewildered beast that staggered before them. They didnt know what to do either and by now my large friends were cowering (hey is that where that word comes from?) on the corner of the forrrestry- still quite close to the road and what would surely be a horrible accident. Worse came to worse and I just decided that it was time for the Annie Oakley in me to come out. I started yelling at them and waving my hands until they loved further and further into the forrestry and I could no longer see them. God knows if the poor farmer ever found his cows......I guess I can chalk it up to-
ONE SILLY COW HERDING SOME OTHERS!!